Have been spending time with my eldest daughter who is interested in astrology : last year she journeyed through her natal chart and for her, it explained a lot.
She taught herself about transits, squares, houses and all the other "things" and the fabulous terminology. (Me: crickets ` yeah I got nothing !)
I adore astrology , but I don't understand it in depth. I know enough to save myself and that's it.
She will often message me and always finds other little snippets of information that can benefit or explain certain areas in my natal chart.
She is happy plodding along, teaching herself and generating charts for family.
But what I love the best, Is when she looks and interprets a aspect/house intuitively. That to me is the best and spot on.
So going through my chart she finds a lot of links to the Underworld/Death/Metaphysics.
Written in the stars ? Who know's, maybe?
I had a shamanic astrology chart done by Mikailiah last year and it was there too, my underworld meanderings.
Check her out , she is amazing.
I wanted to know why I don't actually talk/ write about in a public way?
Like my blog ?
It's not because it's a taboo subject or not openly discussed. Couldn't give two shit's...because if I learnt anything about my time earth side...Life is way to short to be giving fucks.
I teach about it weekly, In my glory doing Palliative workshops in Aged care. Actively practising my craft.
Anyone that knows me, knows I get excited when I actually speak about it.
My heart calls me and my head bursts with love, stories and a remembering of home.
I often need to reign it in, I can scare the shit out of people. I'll never forget a couple of the students faces when I introduced death....
Just because I am comfortable in the underworld, not everyone is.
At the same time as getting excited when I speak about death,In the physical the energy drops and becomes sacred , often words are not needed.
One particular story stands out ~
I was called a couple of years ago to do ceremony for a palliative patient in a Nursing home. I had a frantic call from the facility: it would be soon.
I knew I would get smashed in traffic,
but I also knew I had enough time to get there. I didn't rush, I didn't need too.
Now I had worked at this particular facility as a nurse, so the staff knew me well. They were expecting me to come in bouncing , like I normally would for a normal working shift...No.
They may have informed this particular family, that I was bright and bubbly. The family were obviously expecting something different :)
Death starts working with me, before the person crosses over. Could be a week or a day or a hour, I can't explain it.
My energy drops into the sacred and there is such a absolute clarity of what comes next.
I don't need to speak, I only listen and react accordingly.
The daughter asked if I was a Witch (I'll never forget it )and I said yes.
I was in the medical as a Witch, a place where I had worked as a professional Nurse and I claimed Witchyness.
Because that day I wasn't a nurse, That day I was the deathworker.
It was beautiful and I could answer medical questions that the family asked. I worked along side my nursing colleges and it was a eye-opener for them too.
I think they got a lot of validation on why we do what we do and how it's never about us..it's about the family and the one Journeying home.
As nurses or carers they are natural space holders when someone is dying , we all are. We worked as a team that day: The medical and esoteric,the way it should always be.
I have one foot in the medical and one foot in the spiritual ...talk about walking between worlds. Hahaha :)
My soul sister Julia from Sacred familiar, wrote recently about my deathwork in her blog.
I read it and went Farkkkkk !!! She is a dear friend who has always supported me in everything I do.
As she was writing she heard the song "Flaming star" by Elvis.
As I listened, I had tears streaming down my face. I grew up on Elvis and love him dearly.
Apparently there was unreleased version of this song called "Black star" If you Youtube it, you can listen to it. I told Julia and we ended up on massive tangent's ,like we always do.
David Bowie released his album Black star prior to his death. Elvis was his Idol and they were born on the same day.
Props to his Idol? He knew the black star was on his shoulder.
RESPECT Bowie, respect .
So back to my of not writing/talking about it publicly:
At first I thought I was worried of judgements from the medical world pffftt yeah...just Nah !
Then I thought I was worried about the "spiritual " world ? Again ...fuck no
This is what I discovered. ( With the help of my beautiful daughter)
Sign in the 12th house is what you are not naturally comfortable with. Dreams and secrets. WITHDRAWAL.HERMIT
Assistance with soul work. My 12th house is ruled by Scorpio, the Lord of the Underworld. With all the sex, death and occult symbolism from Scorpio, this is often hidden by the nature of my 12th house.
The 12th house is for our secrets, hidden things and endings. I have only one planet in this house and it is Neptune, Lord of the weird ,spiritually psychic, airy fairy people. (Alex's words) haha
What does this all mean?
All the energies in my 12th house, including the house itself are to do with spirituality, death and endings. Is that not a perfect summary of me as a death worker?
Yet the nature of the 12th house, causes me to hide this part. I am neither ashamed nor proud of it. I just get the job done.
I don't think it's anything special, It's a part of me like the breath I take.
When I'm teaching/training : natural as, because it's my world and calling. I don't even have to think about it. It just is.
To write about: is extremely fucking hard. To share, even harder..Scorpio you fucker!
Very contrary I know! A bloody walking contradiction.
Throw in the Uranian energy of the ultimate rebel, which is also very dominant in my chart and wella secretive ,ratbag rebel against the norm.
This is the longest blog and most epic one I have ever birthed. I feel my soul is naked and I'm out in the open.
I don't mind being naked , but I need to cover my head with the veil.
In the dark and other worlds I am content,happy & rocking it.
It's out in the open that I'm not so comfy.
All death workers are different and come from their own knowing.
The end goal however is the same for all of us, to die a good death.
I have had a hiatus from healings, readings and anything remotely connected to this work for over a year now, sometimes you need to get lost in your own path to understand learning, healing and grow stronger in the quite moments.
I used to panic and think I should be doing healings. Truth is I was torn. I am a healer, yet my care factor to give healings has been Zero. The room is set up, yet I can’t find the motivation or energy.
I believe last year was a transformative year for many of us. A lot of questions where raised as to what and where we are going? Lot’s of life path stuff.
I still have no motivation to do healings or readings.
I reflected back and realised I've been healing/Reading for a long time now. I would read for friends around the kitchen table. I have always done hands on healing for family and my children, since I can remember - it was a part of our life. I still do (very sporadic) healings on my family and close friends and that’s about all I can manage these days.
If you have to force it. Probably not what your soul needs at that moment in time.
I learnt a lot last year about myself by just honouring and taking a break, which I needed and by being honest of what I didn't want.
What do you want to do? How hard that is question?
Unless you are clear and know. It’s a hard question to answer.
I could never answer it concisely, too many bloody outcomes my mind would meltdown.
I started by eliminating things I didn’t want, for me that was easier.
Doing healings and readings happened to be at the top of the list.
Rather than doing healings I have been teaching and training, which I adore.
I have been following this path and it has led to so many magical moments, teachings from mamma earth, animal brothers and spirit dreams.
My mind got in the way and I thought “I should be” doing something “spiritually”.
Fact is I already was and am.
I’m doing something I love: Simple.
Will I return to Healings one on one? I don’t know? Can’t foresee it at this stage.
I don’t know where I will be in a year from now, who does?
My husband and I are thinking about selling everything we own and travelling around Australia in the not too distant future. Another twist in the crooked path…
Follow the signs and synchronicities that come your way with a open heart, you never know where it may lead you.
#Sharing below some magical moments :)
Surrounded by 3 women in a room looking at them my eyes can’t focus..my eyes are blurry . I am telling them I can’t see properly. I am scared and feel light headed. My eyes want to close, but I know when they do, I will go into the abyss. I can’t fight it anymore and as my eyes close I am in the dark, free falling into peace and nothingness. Surrounded by nothing, yet everything
Surrendering into unknown , free
A student found a turtle at his home, he asked around his neighbourhood and no one had "lost ' a turtle. I told him I would have take him.
I didn't realise , until I got him that he was a Eastern long neck or snake neck turtle. Such a beautiful, wild creature. He belonged in the wild. He is a protected species. We took him to the Vet on the advice of Wildlife Victoria and after a once over ...released him back into the wild ♥
Turtle teachings for walking your path
The turtle symbolizes our peaceful walk on this earth. It represents the path we take as we embark on our journey through life. In contrast to emotional or spiritual development occurring in bursts, the way of the turtle anchors our personal unfolding in a slow, more grounded series of steps and longer cycles of transformation.
The turtle is associated with our physical and embodied evolution on the earthly plane.
Call this spirit animal for help to be more grounded. You can also get help slowing down and pacing yourself, so you can take your next step with more confidence.
Having the turtle as totem means that you have an affinity with the ancient wisdom of the earth. You are naturally tuned into the elements, land, plants, people and animals.
You carry your home on your back figuratively speaking and feel at ease wherever you are
The turtle symbolism is characterized by the association with the Earth and earth symbols of groundedness and patience:
By Elena Harris, SpiritAnimal.info Editor
Thank you Turtle :)
"If you look at the cycles of the moon, it starts as a thin crescent and then gradually waxes until it becomes full; then it gradually wanes back into another crescent and then it is gone. The moon reflects sunlight like humans reflect information. We wax and wane and when we become full moons, our egos are full. We think we have this knowledge when in fact, the information we have is pure. And how it reflects or shines off of us, is something we take credit for as though the moon could take credit for its brightness when, in fact, it is only reflecting light from the sun. We have to understand that we are ego-less just as the moon is without light. It and we are simply reflectors. The ego is not responsible for the information. It can reflect the information in creative ways, but the information itself is pure." -Maynard James Keenan
I want to talk about Eagles… They are definitely my power animal. But I am not a expert or animal whisperer in any way shape or form. I always want to share insights about eagle medicine when it comes, but something always stops me. I think I get scared, if I'm to be completely honest. The old “who am I’ to offer insights raises its head and I'm like: "What the fuck do I know"? Something we can all relate to, no doubt.
Eagle came into my life about 6 years ago (fully) because I took my head out my arse and paid attention!
In my dreams and in the Physical. Bringing big medicine with him. He has been a constant in my life and sometimes I don’t honour the wisdom he offers.. I take him for granted and forget the wisdom he brings.
Last weekend, I finally got it..
I mean deep down in the visceral, in my bones, in my gut. If I thought I got before, I was dreaming. Ya gotta understand in my defence when he graces me with his presence I am often just in Awe.
11 eagles came to visit. The last one came very close to check me out, and then flew very high in a very casual manner. As I watched him depart, I saw him rise and rise and he truly gave no fucks about what was going on below .
Yes he scans and checks out ,what's cracking below. He visits mother earth and the tree's, but ultimately he belongs to the skies.
As I watched him, I got it and truly the message was “no fucks given”.
(Hey, I swear like a wharfie, he knew I would get that)
If you Google what Eagle means in the Totem/ spiritual world the terminology is often: higher perspective, wisdom, rise above and so on and so on.
Yeah I get it, but it needed it to be said in a way that I would understand.
In times of turmoil and when we are not sure, we often forget to look at the bigger picture, as we get bogged down in life. We forget to look up and see the beauty all around us.
The Eagle still has to hunt and live, as we mere humans do. But he also knows how to be free. He knows when to let shit go and fly high above it all. Do you think he cares what other eagles think of him? He’s got places to go and places to be. He is the King of the sky. Not in an arrogant way, in a” just got my shit sorted” way.
If we could take a leaf from his book, the unnecessary, self imposed restrictions we place on ourselves daily would drop away. We are so truly hard on ourselves.
If we allow ourselves time to be and de stress from the mundane every once in while.
We might be able to glimpse the sky and know it's ok. We are fine and the solar king remind's us of this by truly honouring his path and himself.
We all need a little reminding, that even in the darkest of times, we have the ability to connect to the divine (ourselves).
Hail and welcome the last day of 2015 !
What a year it's been.. I rose to watch the sunrise on the last day of the year. Death of one year and rebirth of the new year coming, with a sense of anticipation.
I can't do new year resolutions: because I'm shit at it and never follow through, too much pressure and really who needs that!
New Year resolution :
I'm going to lose weight: The rebel in me then decides to eat every fucking thing in sight.
I'm going to (try ) to Stop swearing........./././ F$%K
Fail on the New Year resolutions.
I'd rather spend the last day reflecting on the year that's been: what I've learnt and what I haven't.( Then I'm ready for the motherfucker in the new year )
Taking stock and giving myself a pat on the back when required, or kicking my ass when needed on things I could've handled better.
Blessing it all and letting it go :)
Globally and personally it's been a epic year. So much has come to pass. On the world stage, we have witnessed atrocities and humans at their worst. Also humans at their very best,so contrary.
I will not subscribe to FEAR because at it's heart it's still a wonderful world and I'm grateful for still being topside.
On a personal level, I have realised many things about myself, the world and my surroundings.
Number 1 biggie:
At home I've had children( well 3 adult children) return from their ventures of moving out of home a few years back, they all returned to the nest this year, staggered and in stages. I had one move back in and one move out on the same day!
They are different from their experience's of being away (maybe I'm different?) and appreciate home. It's been lovely. Change is constant and this year I've really learnt to go with flow. Maybe it's just because I'm getting older and have less fucks to give ? Who know's?
Number 2 biggie :
Teaching, yes I actually said it! I am a teacher, earlier in the year that would have stuck in my throat , I would have choked on it...no kidding.
I love going to "work " and Teaching. I'm quite good at it :) (apparently) hahaha
It has been transforming on so many levels. Because I essentially gave up healing work to teach , it was a bit conflicting to me at first. I then realised that it hasn't changed, just in a different arena.
2016 is uncertain , new, fresh and exciting. Make it yours. I intend to make it mine.
'As this year draws to a close - been reflecting on the year as a hermit. We go in cycles and this year was a 7 year for me. I Craved solitude, gentleness and peace - which is not unusual, but somehow it felt magnified by a million. Every thing outside my space felt harsh and I was seriously thinking I may have developed a phobia!
We all need solitude at some points in our life. I think that's when you become comfortable with you. All else drops away. Lot's of learning, searching and integration of self. A veiling of mind,body and soul as such.
A hermit year allows you to just be. However the brain/ mind can be the greater adversary- thinking , warring within -reminding you to go forth and be a part of the human race, yet the lone wolf has other ideas .
Yes ,a strange mixed year indeed.
I found this encaustic art that I did at the start of the year today. It was placed in a book - I wrote on the back :
As we see this year out and welcome 2016 , consider doing your personal year numerology to see what the new year has in store.
It's nice to know the coming energies that you will most probably be starting to feel anyway.
(from the cave)
Happy new Moon :)
The new moon marks the start of the new phase in the cycle of waxing and waning. The moon is New, full of latent, powerful energy, very receptive to intentions.
That's well and dandy, particularly when you are firing on all cylinders.
Sometimes it's hard to be positive and send out new moon intentions, when you have no fucks left to give.
It's December and I have used my quota :)
Just coming out of the dark moon energy can be be jarring. So I thought I would share this amazing Music from Jonathan Goldman.
When I play it in circle or Healings it can have a profound effect on the person.
When we Journey I usually send out the intent that the person receiving will meet their Guide/Shaman and stand in the Flames and release.
Just Imagine you are in your safe, sacred place. Let your mind be taken over by the music. Imagine a fire and your guide sitting there waiting for you. He/she invites you to stand in the flames and burn away everything that no longer serves, let your imagination and intuition guide you.
Perfect to do before you send out your new moon intentions
Enjoy and Rock on