Firestarter

The Explorer of Fire spins her flaming orbs through the darkness, the poi making a pattern of dazzling light that arcs and loops and falls. Her movements are as sensuous and sinuous as a serpent, and just as mesmerizing. She has practiced long hours to make her movements look effortless. But the skill of fire spinning requires her to be balanced, coordinated, flexible, and daring. She wears the mask of a fire goddess; in her trance state, perhaps she becomes one. As the flames whoosh! around her, she enters the silence at the center of the circle. Fire dancers say that none of them escapes being burned at least once. Fire consumes . . . fire transforms. Fire is dangerous, erotic and hot. The fire spinner’s ally is Salamander, who offers the gift of assisting us through our transformations or re-energizing us when life seems devoid of passion. Gaian Tarot : Joanna Powell Colbert

Well thank goodness for friends!  I was truly in my shit and Julia offered me a “what is your scary “Tarot reading. And man, was I ready for it!

I have been in lock down, scared to move either way for some unknown fear that was clawing in the pit of my stomach.

 Feeling melancholy and having overwhelming thought processes  

Questioning everything I stand for. Everything I think I am.

Struggling with life path and unsure of my journey thus far.

This spread, Unlocked the answers on a cosmic level.

My scary: Is fear of Shining or being me. I know right? We both had a cackle at that!  

Fear of owning my medicine, I mean truly owning it.

Coming out of the cave to offer the medicine to all, rather than offering it to a select few. Dulling myself down so as not gain attention. Trying to contain it rather than sharing it.

In the Merlins cave connected to all the elements and walking with the ancestors I am at peace, Owning it and not afraid.

Bringing it out and being it, without the safety of the cave is the scary. Coming out is the scary.

Past life issues highlighted with the spread was fear of persecution, fear of judgement from others. Wanting to “fit”, wanting to be liked and normal..( Ohh The horror)

Fear of being me essentially.. Fear of showing my power, fear of being ridiculed for my light. Fear of being labelled or branded a show off. Fear of being noticed.

 As I reflected on this at certain key  points in my life  it was clear : What a injustice I have done to my self over the years to make people comfortable in their own power by diminishing my own.

 I am a Healer, Nurse, Wise woman, Seer, Witch, Death Walker or death doula, Medicine woman and I walk between the worlds. I have always, for as long as I can remember.

I’m the one holding your blood and guts in my hands. I'm the one kissing you as you take your last breath.

These are my gifts and the cosmic slap is to start bringing them out of the cave and use my gifts with out fear of reprisal. Without fear of Judgement.

Walk my walk and talk my talk.

Julia thank you for creating this “scary “cosmic spread and trying it out on me.

It illuminated areas that I didn't want to look at and thought I had it sorted.

This spread holds a mirror up to your face and there is no escape. It shows past life and shadow, to the deepest locked away feelings/memories  held at the core. But then its shows the way to step out and embrace all you are on this path we call life.

Love ya work Sister ♥ x
Thankyou 

Bec

Rainbowalker

If you would like to get the “what is your scary spread” head on over to Sacred Familiar and subscribe. www.sacredfamiliar.com 


After word

The Explorer of Fire  (I call her the fire starter) fell  out of the deck as I was reflecting on my reading.  Her message is clear